Warning: Penguins

Seven Vices

I've been tagged by Nora. Just for you, Nora, I'll even make an effort to follow the directions. I'm not promising anything, but I will make the effort.

Sinful Nature

"Sometimes you can learn more about a person by what they don’t tell you. Sometimes you can learn a lot from the things they just make up. If you are tagged with this Meme, lie to me. Then tag 7 other folks (one for each deadly sin) and hope they can lie."

Pride -- What is your biggest contribution to the world?
My superior leadership and organizational skills. People really count on me to see a complex project through to completion.

Envy -- What do your coworkers have that you wish was yours?
More bathrooms than they have people living in their home. I have always wanted a deluxe mansion as the proper canvas on which to display my Martha Stewart level housekeeping abilities.

Gluttony -- What did you eat last night?
A feast that would make a vegan drool. I love harvesting my own vegetables, or buying organic those few things that I don't grow myself. I cook everything from scratch and always avoid those nasty, processed, pre-prepared foods.

Lust -- What really lights your fire?
Favio. The long hair, the overdone muscles, the oiled skin. The LOOK.

Anger -- What is the last thing that really ticked you off?
Tardiness. I abhor people who aren't punctual.

Greed -- Name something you hoard and keep from others.
Housework. I have a very particular way of doing things and really don't want my family pitching in.

Sloth -- What’s the laziest thing you ever did?
Booked a complete spa weekend so I could leave my family and devote myself to make-up and beauty treatments.

I tag the following bloggers -
Holly. She needs help exercising her ability to, um, distort the truth.
Christopher Robin. I haven't had a good eye-roll in a while.
the Maven. I love her whispering sweet words of nothing in my ear.
Kelly???--she's, sadly, taking a blogging break though, and might not answer.

Mango Lessons

Tidbits I discovered at Mango's house today....

Homemade salad dressing is absolutely delicious.

"Blackened" chicken is apparently made blackened by its spices...not by being forgotten in the grill while two friends make homemade Greek salad dressing.

Putting a FlyLady clingie on the wall immediately above the kitchen sink doesn't keep your sink magically clear of dirty dishes.

Two ENFPs getting together to help each other clean out and declutter closets would not make for a productive morning.

Boys produce noise just as naturally, and as often, as they produce carbon dioxide.

Girls can easily have four different outfit changes in the course of a single play date.

Summer is my favorite season and yet it is all too fleeting.

The Cat Came Back

I'm in a state of despair over this cat. I love this cat (don't tell the Jedi.) I don't want to keep this cat, but this cat is breaking my heart. She so obviously wants to be adopted into the family (don't tell the Jedi), and she so obviously can't be. But I want this kitty cat to have a lovely home somewhere. She's beautiful and sweet and wants to be loved and to belong. I'd tried to talk Miss Tammy into taking her home with her. Miss Tammy said her mom would kill her if she brought home another cat. (Miss Tammy has three already.)

I'm not sure what it says about my spiritual life that the most fervent praying I've been doing over the past few days has been about a cat.

Two Cute Sweetling Stories, co-starring Toa of Boy

Vignette Number One

I was in the living room. Maybe dusting. Maybe not. I hear Sweetling in the kitchen saying, "Are you ready for the biggest super-jump of all time?"

"Ready," says an eager Toa of Boy.

Crash. Thud.

Sweetling, "Ok, maybe no more super-jumps."

Vignette Number Two

I was, this time, in the kitchen. Sweetling and Toa of Boy were doing their afternoon lists. I heard this little meowing sound in a sweet little voice that vaguely resembled Sweetling's voice. "Sweetling," I asked, "are you meowing?"

Toa of Boy ran to check to see if Sweetling was, in fact, meowing at us for some reason. (She could have been; this wasn't a far-fetched theory.)

"Mommy!" calls Toa, "There's a cat!"

Ah. Of course. There must be a cat in the backyard that I'm hearing through the open living room windows. I walk into the living room so that Toa can point out the cat, in the backyard, which he has spotted.

No. The cat isn't in my backyard. The cat is in my living room. She walks around meowing plaintively. Brain numb for a moment, I walk past the cat to head downstairs to discover how the cat got in. The cat follows me, mewing. Toa of Boy also follows us. I am the pied piper of a rather unusual procession. Fortunately, my brain clicks back on and I have the presence of mind to close the laundry room door and to send Toa, who has barreled past us, to close my bedroom door.

Sensing a set up, the cat halts on the stairs. I try coaxing her into following me again. Mango, who was on the phone with me when the escapade started, tells me to just pick the cat up. I tell Mango I don't want to pick the cat up. Fleas, poison ivy, and claws are all distinctly possible outcomes of attempting to pick this cat up. Yet, in the end, when the cat has decided perhaps she'll go back upstairs after all, I pick the cat up and carry her through the wide open screen door.

The screen door has, of course, been left wide open by Sweetling, who is outside dutifully checking on her garden plants. (The few veggie plants that the rabbits haven't eaten, that is.)

Now I'm standing on the patio staring at the cat and the cat is standing on the patio staring at me, and mewing. "Maybe she's hungry," I tell Mango.

"Is she thin?" asks Mango.

"No," I say. "She seemed pretty healthy when I was carrying her. Her ears aren't too dirty or buggy. Her coat could use some brushing, but she doesn't look like she's been neglected. Should I feed her? What could I feed her?"

"If you feed her," says Sweetling, "she'll just keep coming back."

Now, during this whole process Sweetling has been oblivious to the fact that the screen door was wide open, despite how many other days I've thrown a little fairy fit about the screen door being left open. Sweetling has been seemingly oblivious to the fact that another human being and a vocal cat has suddenly appeared on the patio with her. But which part of the proceedings does she tune into? The part where she gets to pipe up with the same practical comment the Jedi would make.

(For those of you concerned about the cat, the cat was not hungry or thirsty. I offered both food and water to her. I double checked her ears and did a quick check for fleas, and she seemed ok on both those counts. She just seemed to want attention. She definitely seemed to act like a house cat, and not a stray. I'll keep my eyes out for her and ask the neighbors when I see them to determine if she has a home.)

Lastly

My Camp GonnaWannaFly plan worked really well for me yesterday. I got a ton of cleaning done, and the living room and entry way looks much better for it. Plus, I still had time for some personal writing, phonics with Toa of Boy, chatting with friends on the phone. All in all, an awesome day. I'm going to try the same format today, focusing on the kitchen. Today is also a grocery shopping day.

Camp GonnaWannaFly

Good Morning, Campers :)

I have a new plan. (ta da da da daaaa!) A new *brilliant* plan. (ta da da da DAAAAA!) For getting my house in order.

Let me explain.

Over the weekend I found myself wishing, if I had oh, two hundred dollars, I could pay someone to come over and clean my house from top to bottom. Then I thought, no, really it needs more than that. It needs clutter cleared away and closets cleaned out and shelves and drawers organized. How much would it cost me to pay someone to do that? Hundreds and hundreds of dollars.

Yes, yes it would. That's how pathetic things have gotten here. (And I have to fight off adding, "pathetic and hopeless.") Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not in danger of child protective services coming knocking at my door. And I can still watch Clean House and be slightly comforted that it could be worse. But it is enough that I think about all that needs done, and I feel overwhelmed, and I don't even want to start.

Now, FlyLady would say, "You aren't behind, just jump in where you are." And she would say, "You can do anything for 15 minutes." And I considered trying to get back on the FlyWagon. I even went to her website last week to see what the zone missions were. I put "declutter for 15 minutes" on my daily top ten list.

But, I have the attention span of a squirrel and the patience of a toddler, and I want my house clean NOW. I don't want to spend all summer with the decluttering projects looming over my head. And after doing a few 15 minute stints, they seem like a drop in the bucket.

So, new plan.

Camp GonnaWannaFly.

Here's how Camp GonnaWannaFly works. (And yes, I stole the name from FlyLady.) Every day for a week, I spend an hour or two decluttering flat surfaces, corners, and edges of rooms. I'll take a different room in the house each day. By the end of the week, each room should be looking pretty good when I walk into it, and that will give me a lot of steam and encouragement to start....

Week Two. Now I spend two hours each day, while the kids are at VBS, to do some serious decluttering. I'll start with the hall closet, and work my way around the closets of the house. I won't get it all done in a week, but I'll get some real ground gained.

Week Three will be a fun week of daytrips and playdates and swimming if we can beg our way into anyone's pool.

And I haven't figured out the other three weeks of summer yet. One of those weeks needs dedicated to Sweetling's room.

Here's what my Week One will look like:
Monday: the front porch, the entry, the living room.
Tuesday: the kitchen
Wednesday: the school room
Thursday: my bedroom
Friday: fun day. order May photos and birthday photos to start scrapbooking next week.

Now, the goal each day is to spend just an hour or so in each room in the morning and so still have the afternoon free to play, watch a movie, go to the library, or go grocery shopping. So, my daily schedule for week one, hopefully, will go like this:

7am--up, stretch, dishes
7:30--breakfast and devotions
8--get kids breakfast
8:30 shower
9--devotions and phonics with Toa of Boy
10--cleaning
11--on Tuesday and Thursday--leave for Toa of Boy's speech therapy
12--(or when we get home) lunch

Anyone want to go to camp with me? I could use a little support and accountability.

And my daily top ten list--
1. Up-yes.
2. Stretch. No, I blogged instead.
3. Weigh 120.8
3a. ha ha
4. Dishes-not yet. I was still blogging.
5. Devotions and breakfast--
6. exercise--
7. Declutter--
8. glasses of water--
9. No-S--
10. Evening--

Just for Holly

When I'm completely stuck (or completely overwhelmed) on what to write, sometimes I'll do a Friday Fill-In. I don't do them every week, cause I don't do anything that regularly. But they're good for a writing quickie.

But seriously, don't feel bad about not blogging. Or at least, don't feel guilty. The blog is supposed to be, ta da, for *you*. If what you need right now is just to sit and read while you're nursing a little one, then do that. But if you *want* to blog, and just don't have time to write "perfectly", then give yourself permission to write "badly". OR (and this is what I've thought about my blog in the past) if you feel that you have to wait till you can write a long, extensive, explanation about why you haven't been blogging, cut it out.

Your blog. Not ours. You don't owe us anything. In fact, I think you should stick your tongue out at the monitor right now and blow a raspberry at us.

There. Feel better?

So, here's my Friday Fill-In. (The prompts are in regular font and my answers are in bold.)

1. I grew up thinking _I could be anything I wanted to be__.

2. _Facebook_ was the last website I was at before coming here.

3. Why don't you _hmmm...I already suggested blowing a raspberry at the computer...so, why don't you write the last nice thing you did for yourself_?

4. _Hot chocolate_ helps me relax.

5. Thanks for the _clothes and ice cream, Telephone!_.

6. _____ very off-putting.

7. And as for the weekend, Friday I'm NOT looking forward to _gaming. Someone "doesn't know" what she wants to do. (And no, for once I'm NOT that someone._
Saturday my plans included _going clothes shopping (for me! wheee!) and out to Graeter's ice cream with Telephone and Tall Girl._
And Sunday, I want to _make Cincinnati Style Chili_!


If you don't want to do the Fill In, Holly, do number 3 :)

Take Care, Take Care.

I feel like a Munchkin now. "Good bye, good bye...."

Weight Loss

In response to concerned friends, let me explain why I'm saying I'd like to lose 10 lbs. First of all, I'm a tiny person. Its true. I think I might just be half-elven. I'm 5' 3 1/2", which isn't too short, but I have the tiniest skeletal frame imaginable. My wrist is 5 1/2" around. So, take a piece of yarn, cut off five and a half inches of it. Hold it in a little loop, there you have my wrist. Tiny.

From the ages of 19 onward, until I got pregnant, I weighed 98 lbs. I didn't diet, in fact, I lived on sweets and junk food until I got married, when the Jedi's more responsible habits and ability to cook ensured me at least one healthy meal each day. I didn't exercise, but I was active. While I was in college I didn't own a car so I did a great deal of walking. After college I worked as a preschool teacher, which also kept me active. I wasn't anorexic or bulimic or even concerned with my weight. But everytime I was weighed, I came in at 98.

When I was expecting, I changed my eating habits. Gone were the chocolates and the sweets and the junk food. Instead I really focused on eating a healthy, balanced diet for the baby. I gained a goodly amount of weight, and looked like someone had stuffed a beach ball up my dress. Observe....

And that's still with a month to go before I delivered.

I nursed Sweetling for a year, and continued my healthy eating, though a bit less stringently. About 2 years after Sweetling was born, I was in for a check-up, and low and behold, I weighed 102. Did I diet to get there? Nope. Did I even worry about my weight up until that point? Nope. Did my stomach look like a piece of dead elephant hide rudely grafted to my skinny little body? You betcha.

Now, Sweetling is 11 and I weigh 120. Don't get me wrong, 120 is not a bad weight for my height. And I don't think anyone would call me chunky. (And if they did, I've got a pretty mean round-house kick now.) But, I still have this ponchy belly gut that I don't like. And year of Tae Kwon Do, complete with stomach crunches and sit ups and the like hasn't changed that any. So, I don't think stomach "flattening" exercises are going to fix it. The only thing I think might have at least a little impact is perhaps some weight loss.

Mathematically, 120 is a nearly 20% increase over what I weighed 2 years after childbirth. It has to be on my body somewhere. Seeing myself in profile leads me to suspect at least a good portion of this additional mass might be hanging out just below my belly button. A few kind friends have reminded me that muscle weighs more than fat, or some such thing. Cause I'm so buff now, apparently.

And even if I don't lose any weight, being mindful of not eating junk food or excess sweets can't be bad for me. And my heart could certainly benefit from a little bit of activity on a daily basis. So, I think my plan is a reasonable one from a health stand point.

I did do a quick google search for other ways of looking at a body's proportion. I'm not quite sure what this one is...but I'm posting it here anyway.
Hip, Waist, Chest Ratio Calculator

Here be my measurements, I think, and their ratios. According to the brief paragraph of explanation on the site,

"Published data suggests that a WHR (waist to hips ratio) of 0.7 for women and 0.9 for men have been shown to correlate strongly with general health and fertility. Women within the 0.7 range have optimal levels of estrogen and are less susceptible to major diseases such as diabetes, cardiovascular disorders and ovarian cancers. Men with WHRs around 0.9, similarly, have been shown to be more healthy and fertile with less prostate and testicular cancer. A CHR (chest to hips ratio) of less that .8 suggests the possibility of poor circulation and poor exercise habits. A CWR of greater than 1.1 also indicates poor exercise habits and suggests dietary evaluation."

hips 38
waist 30
chest 35

wth .79
wtc .86
cth .92

And my ten point check list for the day...which I'll update as I go along.
1. Up-yes. Thanks to the Jedi :)
2. Stretch. Yes.
3. Weigh 121.2 So motivational. :(
3a. ha ha
4. Dishes-yes
5. Devotions and breakfast--yes
6. exercise--wii olympics (and TKD this evening)
7. Declutter--cleared some things off the kitchen counters and table
8. glasses of water--6
9. No-S--one oreo. only one. but that one was just irresistible.
10. Evening--only 6 ounces of hot chocolate and no jelly on my english muffin.

(ps---Holly!!!! Its so good to hear from you again! How are you doing?? What are you doing? How have you been?)

New June Resolutions

Crappy Title. So sue me.

They aren't New Years Resolutions. They are June Resolutions. Here they go.

1. Get up before seven. (Yes, those of you who know me know that this was also a New year's resolution. Yet here it is again.P)

2. Stretch.

3. Weigh self. (just 10 lbs. If I could lose 10 lbs and keep it off, I'd be happy.)

3a.If its STILL before seven (ha ha)...get in the shower. Otherwise...

4. Do dishes and get a shower when Mom is out.

5. Devotions and breakfast.

6. Sometime during the day take 20 minutes to play an active wii game. I don't have wii fit, so this will have to do for a daily exercise.

7. Sometime during the day take 15 minutes to declutter one closet or storage area. (This is just a summer goal. Not a school year goal.)

8. Drink water. I think I'm better about not getting the munchies during the day when I'm constantly drinking glasses of water.

9. Follow the No- S diet. (No snacks, extra sweets, or seconds except on days that start with S).

10. Cut evening hot chocolate to 6 oz. Thats enough to feel happy and its still trimming a tiny, tiny bit of calories out.

That won't lose me 10 pounds overnight. That wont even lose me 10 pounds in a month. But it maybe will be enough for a slow loss. Likewise, it won't get my house clean and organized in a week, but maybe by the end of the summer. Maybe.

Here's how I'm doing today on each of those things:
1. No.
2. No.
3. 120.8
4. yes.
5. yes
6. Sadly, I think Happy Feet isn't quite active enough to count as exercise.
7. I put away groceries, does that count?
8. 3 glasses
9. No-S Caved and bought a Twix bar. Ate half of it.
10. Had nutty bars with kids at church so skipped hot chocolate.

Comlete Your Draft Contest!

I just need to stop visiting Nora's blog. This is why.

The thing that makes it super super tempting is...

A) This contest is half the length of NaNo.
B) This contest is in June, not in the middle of the school year.

Just walk away, Xuan. Turn off the computer, and walk away.

25,000 words. That's half of NaNo. What else am I doing in June?

Ok, official ruling. I'm invoking a rule that all ENFPs should follow. Do NOT, repeat NOT, sign up, jump in, begin, or in any way commit to a new endeavor until you have thought about it for at least a week. If, at the end of the week, it's still something you want to do, then you may join. But likely, by the time a whole week is passed, the ENFP will be enamored with something else.