Thursday, January 28, 2010

Co-op Lunch Room

Most boring blog entry ever. Seriously, don't read it.

I'm writing because I'm forcing myself to write. I don't have any motivation, I don't have a topic, but I'm going to write anyway. Why? Because if I have some time to write, and if I decide not to write because I don't have a stellar blog entry, I'll quickly become trapped in perfectionism. Those of you who know me well may at this point be laughing at the thought of me being a perfectionist. And you're right, I'm not a perfectionist. But I am always at risk for being a defeatist. There is always, always the risk of falling prey to the mindset that my efforts/ability isn't very good, so why try? One of the ways that I combat that, at least when it comes to writing, is to give myself permission to write poorly anyway. (And then inflict my poor, rambling writing on the rest of the blogosphere).

Random thoughts--

--I'm sitting in the co-op lunch room. Hence the thrilling title. I'm free fourth period, for now, and I've finished the Bible study I brought to work on, so here I am with some free time and a netbook. Go me and my netbook.

--Toa of Boy tale. Yesterday I called the children into the kitchen to check out how the snow had melted on excatly half of the front lawn, which is on the north side of the house. The shadow of the roof line made a sharp edge of demarcation between the green grass and the white snow. I was just so impressed by the clear difference between the sun and the shade. Toa of Boy's comment, "So, we can go bikeriding?"

--Crazy Love. I'm going to love this book. I watched a video segment on the website "the awe factor of God" and it was, in fact,  awesome. I tried to pull the video segment up on the flatscreen tv in the living room (which is run through a media center pc), but I wasn't quite the techno geek for the task. I'm going to give The Songwriter all sorts of grief next Tuesday for not liking the video segment.

--Sweetling. Sweetling no longer makes apperances in my blog entries and facebook updates because many of her peers are on Facebook. I don't think Sweetling would appreciate her Mommy sharing "cute Sweetling stories" that are visible by the entire church youth group. Still, I feel guitly that I share about Toa and am silent in regards to Sweetling.

--Three pounds. No, this isn't at all like Seven Pounds. Only that between the middle of December and the middle of January, I've gained back three of the four pounds I lost when I spent several weeks carefully counting calories last August and September. Two months to take off four pounds, one month to put almost all of it back on. And yeah, I know three to four pounds isn't a big deal in the grand scheme of things, but darnit, I worked hard to lose those four pounds. I really don't want to go back to knowing how many calories are in two measly peanut M&Ms, so I'm looking into The Belly Fat Cure instead.

--Sewing. I can do it, I don't like it. It's like cleaning....I can do it, I don't like it. I tend to procrastinate any sort of sewing project. I know you are all shocked by this. Yesterday, the Jedi asked me, again, if I could please mend one of our waterbed sheet sets when I got the chance. I realized later that whenever the family needs anything, the Jedi prioritizes the task and gets it done no matter how unpleasant it is, how grueling it is, how frustrating it is, or how tired or stressed he is. None of that matters. What matters is that something needs done, and he does it. I'm ashamed at how immature and selfish I am by comparison.

--Water. The water in the co-op school building tastes yucky. I bring two waterbottle with me to co-op each week. Today, I had drunk both of them by the end of lunch. Now I have no water and I'm thirsty. Ok, no good water.

--Stampede. Co-op is ending. I hear the echoing stampede of feet on the stairs.

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