Thursday, May 14, 2009

ABC's of me (cause the third times the charm)

You can blame this one on Facebook. I am. I blame Facebook for a lot of things. Like, everyone else's profile seems to have a customized left hand column with flair or other fun stuff. Mine doesn't. Surely this is Facebook's fault. I've tried to figure out how to fix that, but can't. This is also Facebook's fault.

Anyway, I've been tagged several times about another ABC thing. I've done two already, one here and one here. (Three if you count this one, which isn't really about me, but I wrote it, and its ABCs and it popped up in a search. So nyah.)

But, since I'm so delightfully popular, I shall do another ABC list. I am, of course, totally disregarding the standard list for this.

A-Age--As Smurf will cheerfully point out, I am "rounding up on 40". I know I must be middle aged, cause recently no one has asked me which high school I go to.

B-Bed--King-sized water bed. Sadly, they don't make mattresses with different temperature settings...which means the Jedi and I have compromised on a mattress temperature which is too warm for him to be comfortable and just a tiny bit cooler than what I would like. Also, since apparently waterbeds went out with the 70s, lava lamps, and black light posters, finding new sheet sets specifically for the water bed mattress is an adventure in Googling.

C-Cats--No. I have no furry felines. Both the Jedi and Mama are allergic to them, so no cats. The last cat I had was Grendel, who was a unusually small, black, sleek, chaotic-evil creature with glowing eyes. She liked to ride around the apartment on my shoulder, like a good familiar should.

D-Dogs--No dogs. Again, allergies. The last dog we had was Sheeba, an 80 pound lawful good German Shepherd, who let infant Sweetling mangle her ears, and who would literally froth at the mouth while growling, barring teeth, and being the image of visciousness at anything that seemed the remotest threat to me or Sweetling. In short, she was exactly what a good watch-dog should be.

E-Essential start your day item. Hot chocolate. No question.

F-Favorite color---yellow. This is the only "favorite" anything that doesn't change.

G-Gold or silver. Silver. Why? I don't know. Gold is a bit 70s. And I already have a waterbed to fill that function in my life.

H-Height--5'3". Happy? Laugh now. But the girls at Dayspring all know about the chocolate tax. When they get taller than Ms Xuan, they must bring me chocolate to console me. Its a good system and its working well for me.

I-Instruments you play. None. But I dance, I think this bears mentioning. I have no rhythm, but I dance anyway. Last dance Traci had to choreograph a separate section in the middle of the dance for those individuals (me) who are "handi-clapped".

J-Job title. Homeschooling Mom. A title I am both extremely proud of and greatly satisfied with. Even though I've just ended that sentence on a compound preposition.

K-Kids. Three, even though Vaya is no longer a kid. I still get to dance on her kitchen table when I'm an old woman, so there you have it.

L-Living arrangements. (See, I'm tempted to change this one to something more interesting, but now Sweetling is here to fuss at me for breaking the rules. Wooo hooo! My corruption of my daughter is complete! She wouldn't let me serve doughnuts for dinner, but she's agreeing that she'd change this one too!) Lifestyle if you were rich and famous? (Sweetling snickered and said she guessed I could do that one.)

L-Lifestyle if you were rich and famous. A castle. A small castle is a must, complete with a maid, a chef, and a gardener. I could design the gardens, and then someone else could do the hard work of planting and tending them. A nice monthly clothing allowance. Delicious chocolate goes without saying. Maybe an RV for cross country trips to national parks, monuments, and historical sites. A treehouse schoolroom.

M-Mom's name. Changing this one to. This is pushing Sweetling comfort level. Mom's name--Debbie.
M-Mother's Day Gift--A lovely yellow box from Sweetling with an orange x on the lid, handmade, cause I can never find things with an X or my name on them, holding two bath beads. A potted flower and a card from Toa of Boy. Apples to Apples from my mother, even though the Jedi pointed out that this was totally backward. And, a day spent doing whatever I wanted from the Jedi.

N-Nicknames. We can do nicknames. Sunny, Mrs Crazy Teacher Lady, Mommy.

O-Overnight hospital--just the C-section

P-Penguins. I don't even have to check, Sweetling. P is obviously for penguins.
P-Pet Peeve. Electronic devices which seek to sabotage my day.

Q-Quote. "Cute and cuddly boys, cute and cuddly."

R-Right or left handed? Who cares? I'm typing. The keyboard certainly doesn't care.

S-Siblings--Tommy the Tornado, Smurf, Cool Dude. I am the oldest, and therefore the wisest.

T-Time you wake up. In theory? 6:30. In reality? 7, 7:20.

U-Underwear-Bikini briefs from the little girls department cause they fit me.

V-Vegetable you dislike. Lima beans. Do lima beans count as a vegetable? They are green and nasty, so I bet they do.

W-Workout style. Tae Kwon Do.

X-Xrays. Dental. A ton of these cause over half of my adult teeth buds didn't form. Wrist when I fell from a playground at Winton Woods in the second grade. Mammaw made me a yellow sling with mice and ric rac. Elbow when I fell trying to leap over a stone wall in a mad dash to the swingset. Urinary tract (Sweetling says this is TMI) when I had several infections in a row during the course of a year.

Y-Yesterdays best momments. We went to a school-choice rally in Columbus. Four thousand people turned out for it. The rain held off all day, and one of the Representative's aids was handing out lollipops for the kids when they visited the offices.

Z-Zoo favorite- Penguins and red pandas and otters.

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